Tag Archives: struggles

How I survived grad school (up to today) and gained 10 pounds

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How I survived grad school (up to today) and gained 10 pounds

This is my 4th semester in grad school.  Next semester, Fall 2017, should be my last, and I will be a proud recipient of a MBA concentration finance.  I take online classes, two classes per semester and I work full-time (Ouf!).  That leaves me with little-to-no social life, an eating disorder, stress level off the charts, and a ‘happy’ problem (by happy I mean 3 or 4 ciders a week).

I sit at work for long hours. I decide to go to the gym.  I pay for a gym membership that I never use.  I went to the gym once this year.  I do not like moving. I eat a 3 courses meal for lunch. I complain a lot. I drink 3 to 4 ciders per week (the calories add up).  I decide to eat healthy. I buy fruits and vegetables. I eat them. I do not buy more. I look up healthy recipes.  I never cook using them. I stopped eating ice cream at home.  I stress eat churros. I stress eat tempura ice cream.  I eat late at night while doing homework.  I stay up late doing homework.  I sleep less than 6 hours per night.  I have no social life.  I text everyone instead of calling. I make plans to hang out.  I meet up with friends. Most times I cancel plans with friends. I feel bad about my social life.  I go on Facebook and Instagram and feel worse about myself.  I stress out that everyone in my class is more intelligent than me. I work twice harder to catch up to them. I stay up even later to study.  I get tips to lower stress for friends and classmates.  I use tips and it lowers my stress during the day.  During the evening, my stress level skyrockets because I think that I missed important deadlines.  I stress cry. I complain. I start seeing a therapist.  I think about quitting therapy.  I no longer enjoy my work.  

That is how I cope with grad school and work full time. Any tips?

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Silver Lining

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I am going to start celebrating each day. I have struggles, fears, and decisions to do and that sometimes can bring my mood down. But I need to start seeing that each day is a present; it is. In times of doubt, instead of naming things that are not working in my life, I will count the things that are still blessings. I need to see the silver lining more often. For example yesterday, I got out of work at the usual time, and tried starting my car, and it won’t. It was making a clicking sound. At first I thought it was because my gas tank was almost on empty.  I called my boyfriend, who (lucky me) was off on that day, and asked him to pick me up. Then he called AAA to have my car towed to his mechanic. We waited two hours, and about 4 hours after I got out of work I got to eat. I had received a TGIF gift card for my birthday so we went out to eat because no one felt like cooking. At the end of the night, I was tired and irritated. My bills are piling up. I have medical and dental bills amounting to more than $1,500, I paid $500 less than 2 weeks ago to have my muffler fixed. In addition, the end of the month is coming up and I got to pay my rent and my utility bills. Gosh! And I am not even starting on family drama.

On the other hand, I still want to appreciate the fact that I have a loving, caring and understanding boyfriend. I do have a job, I do have a family, and I am suffering from some disease. Things look bad financially, but things look great otherwise. And I want to remember that first and foremost.