Monthly Archives: April 2018

What have you been up to?

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What have you been up to?

I dread that question, especially if it comes from a college friend or a childhood friend.  I always feel like the only goal of that question is to find out about my accomplishments and to measure them against their [my friends’] own. Of course, I know that I have accomplishments that I should feel proud of, but they never seem enough.  They never seem enough when compared to people’s lives on social media.

I already can hear people saying: ‘Instagram’s lives are not real’.  Nonetheless, social media makes it easy for us to compare our life to others; it also makes it easy to believe that the grass is greener on the other side. Every time I scroll down on Instagram or Facebook, I can see that this friend is getting a promotion, this one is getting an even cuter baby, and this one is having a vacation in an exotic place.  It makes me feel isolated because I do not have any of the above; it also makes me feel inadequate and unworthy.  Inadequate because I am not living this happy social butterfly life (they should be what we strive for, right?). Unworthy because if others are making that life happen to them, it must be possible. Now, if I cannot do the same for me, it must be the universe saying that I am not worthy of these pleasures in life.

This Saturday, I am scheduled to meet with a few long-time friends. The one organizing it, I have known since first grade, the other two since middle school/high school.  I know this question will come up inevitably. I am not prepared to answer it.

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